Recent Blog Posts
Divorce Parties Gaining in Popularity
The stigma surrounding divorce has waned as divorce as become more common. By some estimates, 50 percent of all American marriages end in divorce. The collapse of a marriage is even more likely, according to The Nation, in ultra-conservative states and states with higher conservative Christian populations. Two researchers from the University of Iowa told The Nation that this was in part because conservative religious beliefs and the social norms surrounding them 'decrease marital stability through the promotion of practices that increase divorce risk. An example of this could be the secondary status of women.
Bearing in mind that religion'which at one time may have encouraged couples to stay together even in a less-than-perfect relationship'may now increase the chance of divorce, it may come as no surprise that the stigma surrounding divorce is no longer a major factor. In fact, divorce parties, according to a recent Fox News article, 'are all the rage. In Las Vegas, divorce parties have hit new heights of popularity. Glynda Rhodes is a high-end divorce party-planner in Vegas. She told Fox that, 'if they want to burn their dress, or if they want to go to the spa'everybody has a different way they want to release.'
How to Find Safety in an Abusive Relationship
If you or a loved one are in an abusive relationship and do not know where to turn or how to get out, remember that you are not alone. The best way to find safety is to leave the abuser, but sometimes this is not easy to do, especially if the abused person is financially dependent on their abuser.
If you're married, divorce can take time. Your abuser, whether he or she was your spouse or not can still find you. After getting away safely, you should seek an 0rder of protection, which legally restricts your abuser from being near you, locations you frequent such as your home or workplace, and from contacting you.
Other tips from DomesticViolence.org to find safety include the following:
- Get help from family and friends: They may be able to help get you out of a bad situation and get the legal or medical help that you need;
Pet Custody During Divorce
For many couples who opt not to have children, a pet is considered a 'fur child. Unfortunately, according to the Huffington Post, 'the law would not agree. Joyce Tischler, director of litigation for the Animal Legal Defense Fund told the Huffington Post that, 'in the eyes of the law, they are really no different than the silverware, the cars, the home. This makes for some serious arguments during divorce when there is a shared pet, which, according to the Huffington Post, is more and more likely. 'Sixty-three percent'71.1 million'of U.S. households own pets, according to the latest National Pet Owners Survey. The bulk of those animals are dogs'about 44 million,' the Huffington Post reports.
Caring for these pets is big business, too. Americans are estimated to spend roughly $40 billion every year on pet care, up dramatically from an average of $24 billion in 1994. This is not only indicative of the rising popularity of luxury pet items, but also of American attitudes. 'More couples have fewer children than a generation or two ago and view their pet as their kids or companions,' reports the Huffington Post, 'owners pay $2,000 for an orthopedist to reconstruct a dog's knee' high-end pet stores sell rhinestone-studded dog collars, peanut butter biscotti instead of run-of-the-mill dog treats.'
Divorce Less Common for Lower Income Families
If you are considering divorce in Kane County, your best bet is to seek the counsel of a qualified attorney from Van A. Larson, P.C. We believe that all family law cases have reasonable solutions if sought, and we fight tirelessly to deliver the best possible results for our clients. Despite the high divorce rate in the U.S.'approximately half of all marriages end in divorce'some people consider divorce an option only for the wealthy. According to US News and World Report, 'job insecurity and uncertainty about the future may be a key part of what's keeping many working-class Americans from getting or staying married. A new study from the Johns Hopkins University in Baltimore found that there's a class divide when it comes to divorce.
Optimism About Marriage Can Have Negative Effects
When two people get married there is always a sense of optimism. Everyone hopes that they will be together forever, especially the couple themselves. But a new study released recently shows that this optimism may not be good for the marriage. Hoping for too much happiness might end up in disappointment and even divorce.
The study was published in the Journal of Family Psychology in June 2013. The researchers, Justin A. Layner, Benjamin R. Karney, and Thomas N. Bradbury examined the effects of optimism have on the wives during their marriages. Over the course of four years, more than 250 couples were followed and surveyed about the happiness of their marriage.
If women in the marriage had high expectations, their optimism was rewarded with grief. The researchers wrote in their study that 'wives who predicted the greatest increases in satisfaction actually had the greatest declines in satisfaction.'' The negative effects included worse self-esteem, greater feelings of aggression towards their husbands and a worse reaction to stress in their lives. The negative effects were less in wives who had a more moderate view of their marriage.
What is Considered Domestic Abuse?
When a relationship starts becoming abusive, the person being abused may not even realize it. She may convince herself that the abuser is only upset and taking it out on her because he loves her or that the abuse was an accident.
Some people have a set definition of what qualifies as abuse and the truth is, many things can be abusive and it really depends on how the person being abused feels about it. One thing that is certain is that no one has to stay in an abusive relationship. Family law attorneys in Batavia, Illinois can help protect you from your abuser with an Order of Protection.
Abuse typically starts out small and builds into much more aggressive acts. Some actions that are considered abusive and also may lead to worse acts of harm, according to DomesticViolence.org, include:
- Putting you down and making you feel bad about yourself or your actions
What is Considered Domestic Violence in Illinois?
Although most of us wish it were not true, domestic violence is in fact a pretty serious issue in our country. According to the Illinois Department of Public Health, almost one in four women in the U.S. will be physically assaulted or raped by a close partner at some time in their lives. Domestic violence is real, and it is a growing problem in our society. Surprisingly, most people are not aware of what domestic violence means exactly.
Illinois Attorney General Lisa Madigan states, on her website, that anyone who hits, chokes, kicks, threatens, harasses, or interferes with the personal liberty of another family/household member has broken Illinois domestic violence law. 'But who falls under the category of another family member or household member? Illinois State Police consider the following persons to fall under this category:
Splitting Up the Holidays with Your Ex
Thanksgiving is right around the corner. By the time that holiday is over, the winter holidays will be in full swing. If you are getting a divorce or are divorced around this time, it can make the holidays even more stressful. There are steps you can take now to limit the aggravation of sharing the holidays between you and your ex.
The best thing to do is plan with your ex as much as possible. Having a set plan for when each parent will spend time with the children will eliminate most of the stress of the holidays. Also take time to talk to other extended family members to see who will be in town or will be free when you have your children.
Tips for Selecting the Right Divorce Attorney
Once you have come to the realization that your marriage is over, it is important to reach out for support. At first, you can talk to family and close friends to make sure you are making the correct decision. They may even have experience with a divorce of their own and possible a recommendation for attorneys. Then it is time to start thinking about moving on to the next logical step, talking to a divorce attorney. Follow these simple guidelines to make sure you pick the right attorney for you.
First, if you are initiating the divorce, make sure you don't tell your spouse. Letting them know before you file may make the situation more difficult. They may begin draining your joint accounts and also start piling up debt that you could be responsible for.
The second step is to review how you want your divorce to be managed. It is important to identify if your divorce will be amicable or will be messy. Remember this when you start consulting with divorce attorneys as they will be able to tell you about their experiences dealing with similar cases.
Telling Your Children about Divorce
Divorce is a scary and overwhelming matter, one that can be made even more stressful when children are involved. One of the scariest aspects of divorce for parents is breaking the news to the kids about the divorce. While this may seem like an ominous task, there are many helpful tips and guidelines out there to help you give 'the talk' as best as you can.
First and foremost, many children feel that if their parents- who are supposed to love each other no matter what- can stop loving each other, then who's to say they won't stop loving the kids as well? Children often fear that they will lose one of their parents after a divorce or that they will be abandoned altogether; assure them this is not the case. Make sure your children know that you will always be there for them and will never stop loving them.
To give the talk effectively, it's best for you and your spouse to agree on what you're going to say ahead of time. You want to iron out all the details of what will and will not say in front of the kids. It's important that the two of you do not argue or contradict each other when breaking the news. It's best to try and present a united front so that the children see you will both remain a part of their lives. You are still a family, just a different one. However, not all divorces are especially amicable. If you and your spouse must have separate talks with the kids, you should still agree on what you will be telling them. You do not want to send conflicting messages about the divorce.
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